The Top Ten Best Films of 2023

 Normally this is the part where I talk about what I felt about 2023 in film; but you all have waited long enough for my best list that I’m just going to keep it short and sweet.  2023 is one of the best film years of recent memory.  Mostly due to the fact that it truly feels like we are out of the pandemic film era.  But the next year or two is going to be rough since we are now in the writers and actors strike affected the film industry era.  Not necessarily a bad thing since the writers and actors deserved and got what they earned and fuck the studios.  But it just made me appreciate 2023 all the more knowing that this will feel like one of the years where we got plenty of good to great films to make up for years of starving for normalcy.

So let’s not waste any more time, we are counting down!

THE TOP TEN BEST FILMS OF 2023

One of my biggest tiring points of this year was “The Death of the MCU” or “The MCU is in Serious Trouble”.  I really hate being the MCU apologist amongst all my friend groups.  Because I so badly want to tell you all to shut up and it’s not the end of the world.

I agree in a sense that the MCU is in a decline period quality wise and for sure quantity wise.  Those many shows and four movies a year became too much MCU for me.  And yeah it became an absolute chore for me to keep up with whatever continuing story they are so badly trying to tell in the Kang…errr I mean Secret Wars…or multiverse…seriously pick a fucking lane and stick to it Feige; you egocentric maniac you.

I think superhero fatigue is finally kicking in more than anything else.  Not everything needs to be a connected universe.  Not everything needs to be rebooted like five times until we get a working storyline that gets us good box office and critical praise.  Hell as much as I love the superhero team ups to make the nerds mark out, we don’t need those either.  We just need to be less oversaturated and go back to the basics as to why A and B worked and not C and D.

And let me also be the first to admit that I called all of this MCU fatigue like five years ago when I called Endgame one of the best blockbuster moments in cinema history.  Back then I compared it to “Goodbye Michael” of The Office knowing damn well the MCU was going to continue; just like The Office did without Steve Carell to mixed results.  

But let me be abundantly clear with my “MCU apologist” role; I feel like I’m wearing a badge of honor.  It really is not because I’m so sick of it.  Y’all think the MCU is doom and gloom?  They are still in a better standing than wherever the fuck so many other IPs are.  I’d put more fear in Star Wars if I were Disney than Marvel, which is still okay even after a dropoff quality wise.  Hell DC and Sony are dumpster fires right now.  Hell I’ll go a step further and say that I have more faith in the MCU moving forward than I do of any WBD IP.

So all of these MCU proclamations can just be put to rest.  I don’t think it is what it once was and peak MCU was truly special.  But it’s fine for what it is.  Does it need improvement?  Of course it does.  But does it need to be saved or is it dying.  Of course not.  I swear all you extremists make me hate being a nerd.

Speaking of being a nerd, all of this buildup was for a MCU film to show up on my best list. 

10. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

Let me be perfectly clear that this movie has a lot of flaws.  Hell when I first saw it, I thought it was a strong 6/light 7 out of 10.

But surprisingly I came back to this movie more and more throughout the year.  I guess being the only good superhero movie in 2023 does that to people.  And the more I was forgiving of its many flaws because of the emotional core that was this story.  The character exploration and the true sense of finality really stuck to me.  I guess it is fitting that James Gunn wanted to end his tenure with Marvel on an incredibly high note; especially after that stupid heat he had due to his past tweets had him briefly canned.

Is it better than volumes one or two?  No.  But in a year where I truly missed when blockbuster superhero movies felt like a sense of escapism, we at least had one that did it right.  The MCU will continue to move on and hopefully rebound, but at least James Gunn time ended the way it started.  Moving on to bigger and better things….oh who am I kidding, his DCU will also be screwed over by studio executives.  Seriously calling it now.  Next.

No amounts of over explaining is really going to justify placing this next movie on my best movies of the year, but I’ll certainly try.

9. Cocaine Bear

So we’ve been getting a lot of 80s nostalgia in pop culture for the last twenty or so years now.  I don’t know if you’ve heard of that, but seriously, it’s been overkill for awhile now.  It has been getting to the point that I’ve been wondering when we are going to get true genre films from that decade and not just using the 80s as a plot device to hold the films up like a crutch.

Well say no more America.  This is a true blue 80s-sploitation comedy horror film through and through.  This movie was so batshit bonkers hilarious that I loved it to bits and pieces.  Even my wife had a ball laughing at it and she normally shrugs off movies like these.

The casting is on point with a bunch of character actors and actresses like Margo Martindale, Ray Liotta (RIP), Keri Russell, O’Shea Jackson Jr, to name a few.  The direction….we need to start putting some respect on Elizabeth Banks name y’all.  I admit that at first, it was a rocky start with how mid the Pitch Perfect sequels and Charlie’s Angels reboot were.  But her direction here was actually really damn good.  Maybe there is something to her new career as a director after all?

5.9 on IMDB.  Y’all are dead wrong. 

Okay now that I got the two untraditional best list choices for the year out of the way, time to start hitting up the usual suspects you've probably seen on other people’s write ups.  Starting with…

8. American Fiction

So I’ll be honest in saying that when it came to my annual best picture nominee binge, I really did not know what to expect when I saw the trailers for this one.  Because at first glance, I thought this was a giant troll comedy about how African-American writers were to be perceived by white people and this one guy was going to play in to said white people tropes to write a faux best seller because white people are so easily gullible.  Which they are.  I even told my wife after the movie that she sounds exactly like the gullible white people in this movie when she tried explaining her interpretation of it.

What I did not expect was the amounts of depth this movie had.  Jeffrey Wright reminded me just how talented he truly was as Monk; a man who was at a crossroads in his life between sticking to what he knows and learning a little about himself and who he is as a person.  Sterling K Brown really is continuing to elevate his own career as Monk’s brother Clifford, who recently discovered he is gay.  Both actors absolutely deserved their noms this awards season.  I am a little disappointed that Leslie Uggams didn’t get any sort of consideration as Monk’s mom, Agnes; as her character was incredibly relatable to me personally who has two grandparents dealing with bouts of dementia.

And the twist ending, I absolutely did not expect the amounts of meta commentary and Hollywood-esque cliched endings.  Let’s just say that it’s telling that the director of this movie was one of the guys behind The Good Place as that was very Good Place-esque.  Nice surprise this movie was.

7. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

Might as well throw 6 in here too.

6. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem

What a year for animated films, my god.  These were two of the best reviewed mainstream movies of the year and rightfully so.  I was floored coming out of both of these movies.  Not just regarding how wildly impressive the animation was, but as to how they are breathing new lives into IP’s that have been beaten to the ground in terms of reboots and oversaturation in Spidey’s case (Spider-Verse movies withstanding because the first and the second are absolutely wildly different in a good way).

Let’s start with Across the Spider-Verse.  A movie sequel that is so wildly imaginative.  So artistically stunning and creative.  With a story so deep and magnificent…that it has to be split into two parts.  Yeah that trope that I am really starting to get fucking sick of; especially with how it ended at such an in opportune ending spot AND all of the news that has come out afterwards about how the animation team was treated while making this beautiful to look at sequel is part of what made me rank it below the TMNT film.  But make no mistake, I absolutely get why it is going to sweep all the animated film awards…except the Oscars.  Lord and Miller probably aren’t too happy about that.

I expected Across the Spider-Verse to be as good as it was.  So this is me just bluntly putting it out there, but where the hell did Mutant Mayhem come from and WHY was it so fucking great??  Honestly, my admiration of this movie is very similar to one of my favorite movies of 2011, The Muppets.  You can tell watching that movie that it was made by someone who had deep love and knowledge of the property, Jason Segel.  Well something very much the same just happened with Mutant Mayhem, who was made by lifelong TMNT fan, Seth Rogen.  What Seth Rogen did with executive producing this movie is simply make the best TMNT film ever.  And yes I just went there when I know how beloved in hindsight the 90s TMNT film was.  Yes that film was hilarious then and now, but this movie is just so beautifully constructed and so unapologetically teenage; which is something that none of the movies ever were.

And the animation here is almost as beautiful as Across the Spider-Verse.  So yeah, I guess chalk Spider-Verse one point over Mutant Mayhem for that.  The Spider-Verse animation style is the wave of the future between these two films and to an extent, Puss in Boots 2.  And I seriously hope that not many other animated movies try to replicate that style because it will lose its novelty very fast.  But all of the movies listed that have utilized it feel like there was love and craft into every single frame and for the movies that have tied it too.  So we’ll see how I feel about it if say Illumination decides to start making movies like this or Sony Animation.  But the fact that two of the best movies of this year were both animated mainstream kids films with actual depth speaks volumes as to how adult animation can be.

If you haven’t become a Yorgos Lanthimos stan six years after I told you to, that is on you.

5. Poor Things

I just love this man’s absurdist approach to every single genre film that he makes.  And here he is doing it again with this odyssey tale of a woman who is brought back to life and discovers herself along the way.

First and foremost, I was fully on board with Emma Stone being the best actress winner this year.  Her performance in this is absolutely wonderful.  It’s almost lunar in a sense in its perfect oddness.  This movie basically rests on her performance and she knocks it right out of the fucking park.  The rest of the actors from Mark Ruffalo to Willem Dafoe are all good as well, but the acting in this movie lives and dies off of Emma Stone’s performance and Emma slays, plain and simple.

I can’t stress this enough, we just need more original material in this day and age.  Yorgos Lanthimos is one of the most original directors working today.  Not a single film is like the next.  And the way he directs just makes me love how his films are always going to be visually stunning.  His costume and set designs here were rewarded and rightfully so.  How he plays with colors is expressive and how he implies foreshadowing as to what is to come is just a film fanatic like me’s catnip.

You’ve all been warned so go see his next film coming this year.  I just started the hype train…..and if you are just saying fuck that, I just want to see Emma Stone have sex with practically everyone; I don’t blame you there either.  As a major Emma Stone fan and my personal celebrity crush; yes.  Just yes.

So you guys know by now of my Academy binge, well here is my front runner for who SHOULD win best picture of the year.

4. The Holdovers

You finally got me Alexander Payne.  About damn time to because year in and year out, his best picture nominees I have felt were mostly overrated.  Truly I have not loved a film of his since Election and that was twenty five years ago.  Every film of his since from About Schmidt to Sideways to The Descendants to Nebraska has felt VERY by the numbers for him.

What The Holdovers did to truly deliver over the edge to me is something that I never really felt in his other films.  Genuine human connection.  Paul Giamatti may have won his acting awards for Sideways, I far more felt a connection and relatability factor with his role here as an alcoholic teacher with a lazy eye who wants to push his students into being their best selves and not cost off of their rich parents.  Da’Vine Joy Randolph was great as a grieving mother who has not fully come to terms with her son’s depth.  And this kid Dominic Sessa; who this role was his first acting role ever…my god; get this kid some more work.  He delivers as the kid who doesn’t want to end up like his father and fears that he will become him with his own quirks and mannerisms.

Yeah I wish we saw more of the other kids in this movie which kind of turns The Holdovers plural into The Holdover (spoiler); but this movie was never really about them.  It was about the bond between the three leads, most importantly teacher and pupil.  And as a lifelong fan of coming of age movies…that also played a huge part into me liking this.  It’s like a modern day version of The Dead Poets Society…in all the best ways possible.

Also if you don’t cry in those last fifteen minutes, you are heartless I tell ya.  Heartless.  

……

3. Barbenheimer

….let me explain.  Multiple things.  Because wait a minute, didn’t I just say that The Holdovers is the (should be) best picture winner and here I have two nominees not just ranked above it, but TIED?

First of all, this is my best list.  I can make up whatever nonsensical rules I want.  Second, this list is fluent.  I could say one thing today and then it can change a month to a year from now.  Third, and this is the most important of them all and the main reason, this phenomenon was the best movie theater going experience since Endgame.  And you guys know how much I value any chance to promote a movie theater experience in this day and age.  It is fitting that these two were promoted together because the more I sat back and thought about it, these two are perfect complements to each other.

First, let’s start with discussing Barbie.  Which if I’m being honest, if I didn’t do the tie, Barbie would probably be number nine or ten on my best list.  This movie was absolutely not made for me, but who cares, I can see why it is important for the crowd this was made for.  But even if I don’t get it, that’s fine.  Movie analysis is subjective first and foremost.  And I respect Barbie far more than I actually like it.  Still, I liked this quite a bit.

It absolutely deserves to be the most financially successful movie of the year.  In this day and age, where originality is a pretty barren well, I can’t believe it took this long for a live action Barbie movie.  And the fact that we got one from a very talented writing and directing team with Greta Gerwig and company was just a bonus.  The acting is also really damn good with Margot Robbie solidifying herself as a draw and one of the biggest actors alive and Ryan Gosling stealing every scene he’s in and America Ferrera coming from out of nowhere to show she can be a true scene stealer with her charisma.

Then there is best picture winner itself, Oppenheimer.  The movie that Christopher Nolan was destined to make.  Literally talking about this movie feels like a chore because it is so freaking perfect.  Cillian Murphy proves once more that he is one of the most underrated actors….actually scratch that, not so underrated anymore.  This movie just like Emma a few spots before, lives and dies off of his performance and he’s fucking perfect as Michael Oppenheimer.  This was the role he was born to play and he believably does so from the looks down to his mannerisms.  This film simply would not work without his performance.  And in literally a who’s who of all these big names stars being in this movie, he’s by far the best.

But yes, the Barbenheimer phenomena was one of my favorite film moments of the last few years and it was such a brilliant cross promotion marketing move to get people into theaters that I seriously hope we get more like it.  Saw Patrol may have failed, but maybe Furiosa-field might work Memorial Day 2024….dear god please there are better options than that.  Also more original IPs please!

So as I’m writing this, we are getting very close to the release date of WB’s next entry in their Godzilla & Kong saga.  The anticipation for the first one of these was off the hook for me because I’ve been longing for a cheesy good monster mash movie between the titans.  Especially since there has never been a true good Godzilla movie in my lifetime.  For the sequel?  Nope.  I mean it looks…fine.  But we JUST got the best Godzilla film of my lifetime.  We don’t need this.

2. Godzilla Minus One

Y’all remember how 2014 Godzilla had such great human interactions those first 30-45 minutes and made you feel for the humans in a Godzilla movie….only to completely drop the ball immediately afterwards with interchangeable humans and practically any Godzilla?  Well let’s just say that Godzilla Minus One was those first 30-45 minutes of Godzilla turned into a feature length movie?

I’m just going to get straight to the point with this one.  Godzilla Minus One is about emotional trauma.  And pretty damn accurate historic ones at that.  This movie takes place shortly after the atomic bombings in Japan and connecting with the humans before Godzilla brings his reign of chaos onto the citizens of the country.  And this is the part where I normally want Godzilla to kill all the dumb humans and what not.  But not here.  You resonate with the humans and when Godzilla ends up killing someone I like or damaging them in emotional or traumatic ways; I’m like…no I actually like that person.  Stop that.

Sorry if that is too simplistic of a way of describing my feelings as to why I love this movie, but it is just so beautifully done.  Also the fact that Godzilla looks far more threatening in a film that only cost a couple million dollars in comparison to the latest $200 or so million dollar big budget blockbuster is just continuously hilarious to me.  Maybe someday America Godzilla will get it right.

But until then, this is a mighty achievement for such a long reigning franchise that won’t be topped any time soon.  But Godzilla Minus One did minus one spot from the top of this best list.  Find out what toppped it after a few honorable mentions.

Honorable Mentions:

Bottoms

My last cut from making the best list.  What kind of schmuck would cut this list for a superhero movie that was full of flaws and….I’m the schmuck that can’t justify it.

Killers of the Flower Moon

Another painful cut but let me be perfectly honest on why.  I don’t see myself sitting through this film a second time anytime in the not too distant future.  And in one of the best film years in recent memory, that played a huge factor.  Sorry Scorsese.

Saltburn

In weaker years, this would have made my best list for one performance alone.  Barry Keoghan was that damn good.  What a tour de fucking force he was.  Now just stop casting him as high schoolers for the love of god he’s two years younger than me.

They Cloned Tyrone

Fucking hilariously good time.  This one got lost amidst the Barbenheimer pandemonium last summer and for shame.  This would have for sure stood out in a weaker year too.

Past Lives

God this year was so much better compared to last when it came to the best picture nominees.  Can’t emphasize that enough.  Seriously no complaints on most of the nominees winning…except for Maestro.  Fuck that film.

Wonka

Honestly just copy and paste everything I said about my boy Yorgos since it applies here with Paul King.  Proving once again that this director can just do no wrong with concepts that should not work but they do.  Also that Timothee Chalamet is just killing it these days, huh?

John Wick Chapter 4

How do these sequels keep getting better and better?  Maybe one of these days, one of these films will make my best list at this rate.

Elemental

I don’t normally ask for people to get fired.  Especially in this day and age when AI can replace actual people.  But I hope whoever marketed this movie got some sort of punishment because my god this movie was so much better than how it was marketed.

No Hard Feelings

Jennifer Lawrence fighting completely naked is one of the best scenes of the year.  And not just because she was naked.  Talk about empowering…I’ll stop.

The Boy and The Heron

The best Miyazaki movie in over twenty years and one of his best ever.  Don’t @ me.

M3GAN

Y’all forgot that was this year, didn’t ya?  This was technically a 2022 release, but that was in only like two theaters so that doesn’t count to me as 2022 when it was much more accessible in 2023 as a nationwide release. I love this fucking stupid movie so much more than you all realize.

…zero nominations?  Really?  I haven’t been this pissed off at the goose egg snub since Uncut Gems.

1. The Iron Claw

I’m going to avoid making the Uncut Gems comparison a hundred times and just keep this straight forward with this last statement.  This movie did to Zac Efron what Uncut Gems did for Adam Sandler.

By that meaning, this was the best performance of Zac Efron’s career.  And I always felt like Zac had more depth to him than we’ve ever seen from the actor.  Felt like he always picking good roles, not great.  Or felt like he was underachieving from his full potential.  Even to this day since his latest film Ricky Stanicky feels like yet another movie where he should be doing so much better than that.

The Iron Claw always had such lofty expectations from me as most of y’all may know about me as a die hard wrestling fan.  And the Von Erich brothers tale really does make for a full length feature film experience.  But how Sean Durkin directs this tale is just simply a sight to behold.  I absolutely loved every second of this movie and is now my personal front runner for best film of the 2020’s…yep I said it.

Zac Efron may be getting all my gushing, but Jeremy Allen White also deserves some hefty praise from me.  Which lets face it, this guy already gets plenty of praise for The Bear; and rightfully so, that’s a damn good show.  But I think Jeremy Allen White really proved with this movie too that he is a star on the come up and I will be watching his future with a microscope as well because he has so much potential.

This movie just did all the right things and I don’t think my description here really shows how much I love this movie.  If my only complaint is that the guy who played Ric Flair sucked at being Ric Flair…then you know that is just the minorest of nitpicks.  Now there’s an autobiography I would pay to see on the big screen.  Woo!

…it probably wont be better than this.

Thank you all for reading.  New material coming soon!  Take care of yourselves!

The Top “Ten” Best Hit Songs of 2023

What a wildly uneven year this was.

Don’t get me wrong, this is still one of the worst recent years I have ever covered during my time covering the charts, but at the same time, this best list tops the last two years I’ve done these end of the year lists.  So that speaks for some very good quality amongst a giant pile of shit that is Billboard’s 2023 year end list at least?

Yeah I really enjoyed writing this best list an awful lot and it helped me feel a lot better after all the negativity that spewed off my worst list. So why waste any more time recapping this year when we still have a month left to really judge 2023 as a whole. And since I technically had 13 songs on the worst list, I’m going to at least honor my hypocrisy and do 13 on the best list too. Hooray for misleading blog titles! Karma is that guy on the Chiefs, we are counting down!

THE BEST HIT SONGS OF 2023

…well shit.  Maybe there is something to this guy after all?

13. “Everything I Love” - Morgan Wallen

I absolutely still stand by what I have been saying about this guy word for word.  He is not that interesting of a performer and the controversy has more or less usurped everything about him as an artist.  He’s at the Drake stage of oversaturating the market with overbloated albums solely to rack up hits while providing nothing new to the table as an artist.

But my god, this guy can make some good country music when he really wants to.  I liked that “Sand In My Boots” cover from a few years ago.  He will never make a song as good as “7 Summers” ever again.  The self titled lead single for the album “One Thing At a Time” is very good and was in consideration for the best list.  But this was my personal favorite of all the hits he had this year and he had like 10-15 so one was bound to stick eventually.

I’m just going to get straight to it.  This is Morgan Wallen doing an Allman Brothers song.  Which I don’t think many of my readers will know of The Allman Brothers Band, but that was a classic country act that my parents grew up listening to.  And Morgan Wallen does a great Gregg Allman impression.  It’s funny really that Morgan Wallen’s great songs are when he pretends to be someone else.  Maybe he should take notes to be country music’s equivalent to Bruno Mars.  Thats a niche that needs to be filled.  I wouldn’t mind an album full of country throwbacks…just not 36 songs of them.  That is overkill.  Next.

12. “Cupid” - Fifty Fifty

One of the defining trends of this decade is that each year we are getting a new subgenre emerging into the American public chart consciousness.  We’ve had reggaeton, afrobeats, this year was regional Mexican music, and of course, k-pop being the biggest of all.  BTS was obviously the most successful of the k-pop acts, but most of their wild success came from stan bulk buying to boost their sales.  So outside of “Dynamite”, we really didn’t have that true k-pop crossover and even then, “Dynamite” came from the bulk buying sales technique.

Fifty Fifty’s “Cupid” feels like the first true pop crossover smash hit.  I don’t know if their stans bulk bought this single to prove that, but as someone who still listens to the radio at times, I heard this song everywhere.  Whether in the car or in stores, it just felt like a reminder of happier times back when pop music used to sound like this.  Because my god we are living in the most irony blind and irony poisoned timeline.  What happened to just straight up happy pop music?

I guess if we can’t get happy pop music stateside, might as well pull it from overseas.  This song just puts a giant smile on my face every time I hear it.  And let me be perfectly clear.  I am not talking about the English version…because the Korean version would make my top five.  Why did they decide to remove the beat switch after the bridge to make it more American accessible?  That actually ties the song together even more to make it a slice of pop perfection.

As is, the watered down English version is still a really good pop song as is.  It just reminds me of happier times and these girls harmonize so much better than literally Fifth Harmony and some of the other more recent mainstream girl pop acts.  And if your HAIMs and boygenius’s aren’t going to achieve mainstream hit success anytime soon; then by all means.  More of this please.

Yeah this preamble is going to be a build up for another country song on the best list.  Let’s get that out of the way now, but in all honesty, I can’t believe how much of a firm grasp country music has on the charts now.  That used to be a recurring joke for me a decade ago that country so badly wanted to get recognition from the big names and genres.  

And now they ARE the big genre.  We went 23 years without a country song being number one on the charts to now having four number one hits this year alone.  Look out America.  Firmly grab your cowboy hats and start strumming your guitars.  Hell, even some of the big names of recent are coming to country and folk to save their floundering careers.

11. “Dial Drunk” - Noah Kahan & Post Malone

Make no mistake, this is Post Malone basically trying to get off life support after two flop albums in a row.  And you know what?  It works!  He couldn’t have picked a better song to hop on for a remix.  It’s to the point that I can’t picture this song without him on it and hell, I absolutely loved the original as is.

I guess I should introduce you all to the other guy too.  This is Noah Kahan.  I didn’t know a damn thing about him before this year, but from what little I did check out after uncovering this song the first time; he’s basically Mumford & Sons lite.  Apparently he had four songs charting at once before the Christmas music takeover of 2023.  So he’s probably destined for a huge 2024 at this rate.

You want to know one of the quickest ways to get in my good graces?  Being a karaoke single and my god, I can absolutely see this being a karaoke staple not just in my set but many others.  This is one of the best choruses of the year.  Right down to the triple entendre of dialing drunk, dying a drunk, and dying for you.  That’s just straight up clever songwriting.

I don’t know how I feel about this Americana/folk takeover, but if it leads to more bops like this; then I’m all for it.  This is the best Morgan Wallen song of 2023. 

2023 was a year lacking any real surprises, but you know what the biggest surprise of this year was for me?  This guy has one of my favorite albums of the year.

10. “Fukumean” - Gunna

I know I talked about this on the worst list, but it is still astonishing how much rap music fell off this year.  Like it still is around, I’m not going to act like it is irrelevant now like rock music, “rock music”, or hell let’s be honest, pop music.  But it felt like most of the big names either had down years or took the year off.  2024 will be the real telling sign for the genre, but right now, it’s mildly concerning since rap music hasn’t had a down year as long as I’ve been alive.

Gunna feels like one of the rare exceptions.  I’m not going to act like I’ve always been a fan because trust me, I was not.  Gunna’s brand of trap music has always been watered down garbage or getting emphatically outshone by his costars.  Most Gunna songs I’ve heard up til this point have always had a feature or were incredibly abbreviated fragments of songs.  That was up until this point:

https://www.vulture.com/article/ysl-young-thug-gunna-arrest-charges-explained.html#:~:text=Gunna%20is%20charged%20with%20one,arrested%20on%20May%2011%2C%202022.

Yeah this news was huge last year.  Because it felt like a lot of the big names in rap music like Young Thug, Lil Baby, and yes, Gunna,  were going to end up doing time.  Gunna end up avoiding this by pleading guilty and snitching.  Which most of the time, leads to your career going down the toilet (looking at you 6ix9ine).

So when Gunna announced his new project for this year with zero features, that had me thinking he had to rap his ass off for the first time in his career since basically nobody would want to work with him.  And my god, he actually did it.  This is some of the sharpest songwriting and music he has ever put out.  A lot of looking into his legal troubles, introspection, and stories about his come up.  No half assing anything or watered down beats.  A real solid recommendation from me, check it out.

I would not consider “fukumean” to be the best song off that album.  That actually goes to “rodeo drive”; which the transition from the former to the latter is one of the best transitions I’ve ever heard to the point that I wish both would be one full song instead of two separate songs.  If anything, “fukumean” is one of the closest songs on that album’s that resembles a Gunna song from 2020 or 2021.  But my god, I can visualize the whole crowd going off to this live.  It slaps that hard.  To the point that this has become an instant staple to my workout playlist.  It just pumps you up and those light “yeahs” are one of my favorite music moments of 2023.

We’ll see if putting out the best music of his career leads to Gunna’s sustained success in the future.  Most of the time, snitching does not help keep your fame.  But if it does, at least he went out not with a whimper, but a “yeah”.

This being the biggest hit of Miley’s career still baffles me.  I’ve been gradually warming up to it over the year, but I’m sorry.  I still can’t say I really like this.  Miley already did this song like a hundred times better with “Slide Away”.  I thought we were well past the Liam Hemsworth breakup to the point that this topic is no longer “hot girl shit”.  Now if you want real “hot girl shit”…

9. “Bzrp Music Sessions, Vol. 53” - Bizarrap & Shakira

..:is Gerard Pique the dumbest man alive or what?  Shakira is one of the most beautiful women alive, even at 46 years young!  How fucking stupid are you!?

Look I can make this whole entry about the drama, but let’s rewind to why the, at first glance, weird song title is the way it is.  Bizarrap is an up and coming music producer who is famous on Spotify and YouTube worldwide for these sessions where he and the artist for each session lock themselves in a studio and come up with a song on the spot.  Which I have to admit, is a pretty cool gimmick.

This session with Shakira has sent Bizarrap’s popularity into a whole new stratosphere.  Now instead of being with up and coming artists, all major Hispanic musicians want to do sessions with him.  And for rightfully so.  Shakira could have just made any other diss track about her bastard of an ex and we would have probably still eaten this up.  But turning this diss track into an EDM song was a stroke of genius as literally every live performance of this song has nearly everyone turnt up including Shakira herself having the time of their lives.

This song’s worldwide success was so massive and such a fire of a diss track that Gerard Pique has lost millions of dollars and him and his soccer club are now being investigated for tax fraud and can do serious jail time.  Shakira was included until she settled the payments out of court, thank goodness.  

The world is just better with Shakira in it and her resurgance in popularity this year was just a thing of beauty.  Shoutout to that other song she had on the year end this year with Karol G; who seems to be Shakira’s spiritual successor.  It was a contender for this list as well, but did not make the best list because let’s be honest.  It doesn’t compare to this one.  Next.

Every year, I talk about an entry that was my most played song of the year from Apple Music because I don’t have Spotify so no Spotify Wrapped for me.  Well for the second time in three years, SZA topped my list.

8. “Snooze” - SZA 

How ironic.  The biggest sleeper hit of the year was literally titled snooze.  Actually let me give you all a little back story:

This is Leon Thomas III.  A child star from Nickelodeon back in the day, I thought he had so much more potential in the music industry than he ever did as an actor; which he was fine as an actor too.  And low and behold, he eventually did just that after the show he was on, “Victorious”, ended.  He’s made quite a name for himself as part of the production team the Rascals.  He’s done songs for Drake, Jay-Z, Ariana Grande, Lil Wayne, and Jack Harlow to name a few.

This song in particular though.  He wrote and sung for SZA and SZA absolutely loved and asked for her to cover on her latest album from the end of 2022 that absolutely ruled.  And while that album has a few other hits that I find better than this, I’m actually glad to see this was the second biggest hit off that album.  It just makes me feel like I’m on cloud nine every time I hear it.  Like listen to this again with a fresh set of ears and its just beautiful, sensual, sexual, and amazing.

This song is probably going to remain on the charts forever since the charts are so dead that inertia will keep this song afloat for probably 80-90 weeks and it will probably come in at like the 10-20 range on the 2024 year end list because that’s the way Billboard works now.  But I don’t care, I absolutely love it.  So much so that even a Justin Bieber remix didn’t hurt it any.

Yeah I can’t believe that happened.  This song doesn’t need Bieber.  Next.

Nope, sorry.  I still think this song is very overrated.  Especially since it’s the longest running country song in Billboard’s history.  I mean it’s fine.  Just not spectacular or anything.

It took me awhile to get the appeal of Zach Bryan.  To me, he was just another country artist that was smart enough to utilize TikTok to make themselves famous.  But has the Morgan Wallen effect of flooding the charts with endless quantity.  Christ the EP with “Something in the Orange” on it had 34 other songs.

But with that self-titled album this year, suddenly everything just clicked.  I absolutely get him now.

7. “I Remember Everything” - Zach Bryan (featuring Kacey Musgraves)

Three country songs on the best list now by the way.  Can’t say this has ever happened before.  Speaking of things never happening before, holy shit Kacey Musgraves has a number one hit.

That was the bigger story for me as I’ve been a fan of this woman for over ten years.  She was not your traditional country artist as she let her true opinions and views known right out of the gate and she got blackballed by the music industry for it.  That was some serious bullshit and even when she tried to lean into pop country, it didn’t translate to success either.  Which is some serious bs because “High Horse” especially should have been a hit in 2018 when pop country was all the rage.  I was hearing that song everywhere, but FM radio.

But this song is just so tragically beautiful.  As Zach Bryan’s character reminisces on the upside of their relationship, Kacey’s character unveils the hidden truth that alcohol warped his perspective on their relationship as he was not the man that he once swore to be.  And isn’t that the truth about alcohol and how it can distort one’s views from the hidden truth.  Maybe Morgan Wallen should take a few pointers from all his stupid drinking songs?

I know most of this entry is me gushing about Kacey Musgraves finally getting that mainstream crossover success that she finally deserves, but Zach Bryan has won me over.  If being a Philadelphia Eagles fan wasn’t enough, I finally get that his appeal is being such a strong songwriter and storyteller.  Country artists like him don’t ever get these levels of fame and success.  Especially being vocally pro-LGBTQ+.  Maybe this is the true turning point in the genre’s history after all? 

6. “As It Was” - Harry Styles

And to think, this was my second best song of 2022.  Honestly, the Harry Styles fatigue started to hit a little harder this year.  Probably due to all the Grammy wins for such a decent, but not earth shattering album and me sitting through that god awful “Don’t Worry Darling” certainly didn’t help.

But make no mistake.  This is still an amazing pop song.  When the time comes, I’ll come back around on it again; it’s just that good.  And there are five more songs that I thought were better than it this year.  That’s how good this best list is.  What could possible be better than one of the most Grammy acclaimed songs of all time-

….I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry-

5. “Next Thing You Know” - Jordan Davis 

Last country song I swear.  And even more embarrassing than the amount of them on this list is that it comes from this meat headed idiot.  For those of you who don’t know, this is Jordan Davis.  Literally every song he’s been on up til this point has ranged from mediocre to terrible.  Luke Bryan is one of his major influences for his music and doesn’t that say it all right there?

Luke Bryan only wishes he had a song this good.  To all up and coming artists, one of the best ways to get on my good side is to right a song about introspection and the future.  Country music has a few of these types of songs already, most famously “Remember When” by Alan Jackson.  One of my favorite country songs of all time if we are being honest.  This is no “Remember When” but I seriously appreciate it for trying to be.

The part of this song that really hits hard is the second verse when it comes to this couple trying to start a family and becoming parents.  If that doesn’t hit home for me and that little line about “how you doing there, dad?” makes me cry every time.  Because that is exactly what happened to me.

If I had one problem with this song, Jordan Davis is only 34.  He doesn’t have the voice or maturity to really make this hit home to being one of the best of these song topics.  I mean him and I are the same age.  I’m not ready to have those sorts of thoughts about getting old and looking back on life.  And I bet Jordan Davis isn’t either.  This was probably one of the other songwriters like….one of the guys who wrote Body Like a Backroad!!??!?!?!

…well just goes to show you even the stupidest of musicians can surprise you.

4. “Bad Habit” - Steve Lacy 

Any day now with needing more Steve Lacy’s in the music world…

Wait, wasn’t that my best hit song of 2022?  And it’s only number four!?!?  You read that right.  Now who in the world would make music that damn near perfect to top one of my previous best hits…

She can’t keep getting away with this…

3. “Cruel Summer” - Taylor Swift

…and I say that with the upmost respect.  How many career peaks is she going to have?  2009 was her biggest year ever.  Then it was 2012.  Then 2015.  Now here we are in 2023 and it honestly feels like Taylor is taking multiple victory laps between the ultra successful Eras Tour, multiple albums getting second wind of success, and deep cuts becoming new singles and topping the charts.  

This happened to “All Too Well” in 2021, but that made sense since Taylor just re-released her re-recorded version of Red and made a short film for that song to promote it.  But “Cruel Summer”?  A song that Taylor already owns her master to?  That was fascinating.  I mean it’s justified since this should have been a single from Lover…but then the pandemic cut that album cycle short and Taylor made her two pandemic albums in 2020.

But we are in an era where old music is kicking new music’s ass.  Where many of our biggest hits now have come from the past.  And if anyone was going to get deep cuts turned into big hits, of course it was going to be the biggest pop star on the planet who has already done this before.

Once again, not complaining about any of this.  Cruel Summer is one of the best pop songs of the last five years.  The fact that this was never a true single felt fully justified this year. Taylor trying to emulate St. Vincent is just magical man; right down to her writing this song as well. Any other pop song that would try to rhyme "wooooo oh whoa" with "cruel summer" would have me roll my eyes. Not here. It is just wonderful.

I’m absolutely going to celebrate this being one of the biggest songs of any year. Even 2024, which don’t be surprised if it ends up this high again. Fucking Billboard…

https://www.cnn.com/2023/08/06/business/barbie-box-office-history/index.html

 

I’ll get into this more on the best films list, but Barbie being the biggest movie of 2023 absolutely feels surreal.  Chalk that up to a smart marketing campaign, Greta Gerwig being such a fantastic filmmaker, and Margot Robbie absolutely solidifying her place as one of the biggest names in Hollywood if there was ever any doubt on that proclamation.

But you know what was ingenious?  Hiring Mark Ronson to produce the soundtrack.  That man just has the Midas touch when it comes to music.  And while he did produce the true big hit for the album with Dua Lipa, I’m honestly getting real tired of her retro pastiche.  A Dua Lipa disco song really does not surprise me anymore.  Let’s talk about the real surprise from that album…

2. “What Was I Made For?” - Billie Eilish

…actually none of you should be surprised anymore.  Billie has been at the top or at the very least second on practically every best list I’ve written this decade so far.  And she will probably continue to do so because she is that much better at making music than almost everyone else in the industry right now.  Adding Mark Ronson to produce and write this song with her and her brother Finneas was a stroke of genius.

Let’s go back to the Barbie movie for a minute.  The ending admittedly didn’t speak to me at first, but I totally get that it did for women.  As I was sitting there listening to Barbie talk about her uncertain identity with the spirit of creator Ruth Handler, I just kept waiting and waiting for the resolution to come.  But when this Billie Eilish song came in to tie it all together, absolutely everything clicked at once as the song playing with the montage of strong and powerful women just absolutely moved me to the point that the ending worked.  Hell it even brought a tear to my eye.  It made me think of my own place in this world and realizing that I was made to be a father to my handsome little man.

That’s just the power of Billie Eilish.  She’s at her best when she just lets her words sit there in absolute silence.  Add in an accompaniment from Finneas and Mark Ronson that knows when to peak and when to strip back to let Billie’s words sink in.  It’s just an absolutely beautiful song that is simply just too good for words.  

Before we get to number one though, a few honorable mentions.

Honorable Mentions: 

“Escapism” - RAYE & 070 Shake

Admittedly this song doesn’t have much replay value for me and was the last cut from my best list, but I absolutely loved this trip hop throwback from these two artists who I guarantee we will never hear from again.

“Sure Thing” - Miguel

This song has aged so weirdly.  Who would have thought that a TikTok of what sounds like a six year old singing this song while playing Fortnite would be what it took to give this song a second wind of life and make it chart even higher and last even longer in the public consciousness?  Granted, why should I complain about how it got popular?   A good song getting second life again twelve to thirteen years later isn’t a bad thing.  But it definitely is a sure thing…I’ll see myself out.

“Bloody Mary” - Lady Gaga

Speaking of songs aging weirdly, this was the biggest surprise hit of the year for me.  I wasn’t a fan of this song twelve years ago when it came out; where I was admittedly suffering from Lady Gaga burnout.  But the more I look back fondly of that era of pop music; you know when chart watching was fun?  I can’t help but say this has grown on me.  Electro pop Lady Gaga was the best Gaga era.  Also can Wednesday Season 2 make more 2010s should have been hits trend on TikTok too…

“Cuff It” - Beyoncé 

This is a 2022 song.  I swear these chart years are so screwed up beyond repair now…anyway, I honestly still really like this song.  But weirdly enough, I don’t come back to it as much as I did over a year ago.  Yet, I’m still listening to “Break My Soul” even more.  Think of that what you will.

“Wait For U” - Future, Drake, & Tems

Okay now this is a prime example of how nobody cares about popular music anymore.  This was a thousand percent 2022.  How the hell did this have enough points to make it a second year in a row!?  

“Paint the Town Red” - Doja Cat

Catchiest hook of the year.  Even if the rest of the song is by the numbers Doja Cat.  So much for that new direction and sound though.  I guess you could say she just said that for attention har har.  Oh well this is still a strong 8 out of 10 either way.

“Love You Anyway” - Luke Combs

This is cute.

And that’s all the honorable mentions.  Yes, I know what I said about the good songs really sticking out, but it’s still the 2023 Billboard year end list.  It still sucked.  Without further ado onto number one…

…I should have bought my tickets to The Eras tour.  Damn you, Ticketmaster.

1. “Anti-Hero” - Taylor Swift

Look, I already made an entry deep diving into the 2023 Taylor Swift phenomenon.  I don’t need to explain that any further.  So I can just go even further into why this is the best song of the 2020’s and one of my favorite songs of all time.  You heard me right.  One of the best.  Of all-time.  This would have topped my best list last year if it qualified and once this became the first song to lock for Billbaord’s classification of a 2023 year end list, it wasn’t even a fair competition.  This was going to be number one no matter what.

There are simply too many best moments of this song.  I can’t even begin to describe without gushing over every single little bit.  This song, hell this whole album is phenomenal.  If it wasn’t for 1989, this would be my favorite album of Taylor’s.  And when it came out, boy did I relate to being an insomniac and the thoughts of being one.  Especially since the album came out a week after my son was born and I was even more of an insomniac then.

But the song “Anti-Hero” is specifically about how Taylor Swift is now.  With so many songs about how we should be sympathetic for one of the most successful artists of all time; hearing one about how Taylor considers herself the problem and her inner thoughts about how she deals with it.  This is just a full circle moment for her career.  I don’t hate that many Taylor Swift songs.  I’m not a hater, far from it.  I actually like her an awful lot.  But even I have to admit that Taylor retreading some topics one too many times can be a bit much.

Also, as someone who self loathes frequently, listening to one of the most successful celebrities on the planet talk about her own internal struggles and mental health is just a slice of perfection that it really goes a long way. Especially in this decade, where anxiety and the screaming 20s are a real thing with the pandemic and all the other major new stories going on with the world. Seeing the inner workings of first draft thoughts of one of the biggest pop stars alive really does go a long way.

"Anti-Hero" is about a lot of things. About self-doubt, about being lonely at the top. And just the frustration of having no solutions to the problem of being yourself.

This is Taylor Swift’s world and we are just living in it.  And what a perfect place that is to know this is her most successful song of all time.  It will sweep the Grammys and I got zero qualms with that.

Thank you all for reading. Best Films of 2023 list will come out in early 2024. I might try to get a project up for the holidays, we'll see what sort of schedule life throws at me. Until then, take care.