Hey everyone. So how was your 2023? …what, it’s not even December yet? Somebody better tell that to Billboard and they’ll address that in another ten to fifteen years….god, what a broken company they are. I could go on a whole tangent about how stupid the yearly tracking period is now early November to early October, but I’ve been on so many tangents about how Billboard chart tracking will eternally be broken. The new chart time period is to match up with their annual award show and while that does make some sense, I counter with this. Why not push your end of the year award show to December as well as your end tracking period? Winter is awards season for a reason. Typically not the fall…
With that being said, it is possible to be nostalgically bad while still being modern levels of bad too. For example!
10. “I’m Good (Blue)” - David Guetta & Bebe Rexha
For most of this year, I had the exact same thoughts for this that I had for that Meghan Trainor song. It was hilariously bad and reminded me of when it was fun to criticize music. I didn’t completely hate it…yet.
But as the year moved on and the radio refused to let this song fade away like it did for Meghan because pop is a dying genre, the more its hollow and emptiness rang apparent. This is vapid to a fault. Nobody on this song even tried anything creative. You have the most obvious sample in a timeline where obvious sampling is all the rage and this is stunningly even more uncreative than you would expect at a glance.
I don’t know who is more at fault for this song’s failures. Bebe Rexha being the clip art stock photo of a pop star that she’s always been. Seriously I can’t tell the difference between her, Rita Ora, Anne-Marie, etc. Not to mention that these are absolutely the first lyrics she probably thought of for a song this first grade level. Or is it David Guetta, who has seemingly doubled down on this being his new sound; bastardizing recognizable samples until they are flavorless mush. And I thought his generic EDM from the early 2010s was dull; woof.
This should be much higher on the list solely for being the laziest song ever conceived, but at the end of the day, I do miss songs giving some sort of explicit response instead of absolutely indifference or uninterested levels of frustration. But do I need to hear this song ever again? Nah. I’m good.
And speaking of songs I never want to hear ever again. Overplay absolutely affected this next one.
9. “Creepin” - Metro Boomin, The Weeknd, & 21 Savage
At first, I thought maybe it was me who was missing the appeal of listening to this 90% word for word cover of “I Don’t Wanna Know”. It is just subtracting a Diddy guest verse for 21 Savage. Hell if anything, that should make it an improvement? And honestly, despite how much his stock dropped this year, The Weeknd is still a far more engaging performer than Mario Winans. And I can’t emphasize enough how over I am of The Weeknd. Whether it was his truly terrible miniseries where his acting or lack there of was at the forefront or how increasingly unaware he is that the quality of his music the last few years has taken a nosedive or how he is teasing of dropping The Weeknd moniker. I truly feel like The Weeknd is damaging his starpower. Once again though, he’s not the main problem.
The problem is THIS guy. 2023 was a huge year for Metro Boomin. His latest album was a smash and then he made the Across the Spider-Verse soundtrack; which I loved. If anything, Metro Boomin’s stock has risen exceptionally. But his now biggest hit is definitely his worst that involves him as a leading name. I mean just listen to it. It’s the most stock sounding production I feel like I ever heard. The song is called “Creepin”. You have the obvious sample right at your disposal. It should sound more menacing or at least heart torn, not tonally indifferent.
Look I normally like Metro Boomin’s production, but him being one of the biggest names in music right now just feels weird. I mean this was the defining moment of his year for me. He cameo-ed in Across the Spider-Verse after producing the soundtrack for the album. And in his ten seconds of screentime, not only was there two brief pauses meant to have everyone react to him appearing and his joke, but in my theater, there was absolute dead silence for both pauses. That couldn’t be more telling for how much of a true star he actually is.
And that brief pause will be exactly how “Creepin” will be remembered. Oh yeah…that was one of the biggest hits of 2023, and strictly forgotten. Just like the original version before it. Next.
8. “Favorite Song” - Toosii
…its times like these I wish I could just pin a “This is Bad” tag on this song and move on to a song that there is clearly more to talk about. But this was one of the most successful and critically acclaimed hip hop and R&B hits of the year. Really? This nothing of a song? I guarantee you nobody will remember this this time next year. Hell I barely know how it goes every time it popped up on my streaming playlists or on the radio.
Welp, let me give this the effort it clearly deserves. Remember the “Toosii Slide”? Yeah what an artifact of the pandemic times. Well this was the guy who Drake inspired to name that dance after. And that is literally all I really know about Toosii. Nor why should you all care because this guy is just a low rent Rod Wave.
So maybe I should talk about the song. Not just any song. YOUR favorite song. Yeah buddy, you only wish this song was someone’s favorite song. You clearly didn’t write this to try and get girls. Might as well be one of those acoustic guitar songs with the self-impressed ego that is reeking all over it. Not to mention that Toosii sings this sounding like a castrated Smithers from The Simpsons.
I’m really trying here you guys. But this song is just so fucking boring and douchey. I don’t see the appeal with this one, at all. This isn’t doing anything for me. I bet if I went to this guy’s YouTube video for this song, I would see one of his top comments being “100% Pure Talent” or “No Sex, No Drugs, No Nudity, Just Raw Emotion”. Next.
7. “Players” - Coi LeRay
For the love of god. Will everyone please stop sampling “The Message”? This is the most overdone sample this side of “Shape of My Heart” by Sting. I am sick to death of it. Especially when absolutely nothing new or interesting is being done with it. Got it? Good.
You know what, that’s not completely fair of me. Especially since this is a female empowerment spin of girls can be players too. And you know what, I would normally be all for it…if my daddy didn’t buy me a career too. Yes for those of you who don’t know, Coi LeRay is a product of nepotism. Coi’s father is Benzino, the founder of The Source. Now unlike other nepotism acts, Coi and Benzino don’t seem to be on the best of terms. So her being successful in spite of her father is an interesting tidbit in an otherwise incredibly uninteresting career.
I’m sorry, Coi LeRay sucks. She is just a low rent Doja Cat. Which I get that most female rappers are trying to duplicate Doja’s success by pivoting to a more pop-rap sound. But even then, Doja herself claims to be pivoting away from that. The real telling sign that trying to replicate Doja is not a good career choice is Coi’s debut album, which is basically one of those 90s 1-800 compilation albums of guess which recognizable sample this is.
So what about the song itself….it’s incredibly boring. The song itself is built around the sample and Coi does nothing new to it that we haven’t seen Ice Cube or Puff Daddy do before it, except be female. And look, just to make a point so I don’t come off as sexist and hating this for being female. If you want female empowerment songs about this same topic with actual personality, listen to that other hit from this year, “Area Codes” by Kaliii. It does everything right that this song does absolutely wrong.
FYI this would rank much higher up the worst list if it wasn’t for the Jersey Club remix. The version of this song that made it trend on TikTok and unfortunately the label didn’t push. Hell, even the music video above knows that this version is better. I’m all in on the Jersey club trend btw. Stream that song instead and it is almost as good as “Area Codes”. Amazing what changing up a sample to make it different from the others before it, can do right?
6. “Need a Favor” - Jelly Roll
Ever wondered what a Nickelback song sounds like with Creed levels of subtle lyrics about religion? Well boy do I have a song for you…
Look, I'm not an expert on religious adult contemporary music. Nor do I really know much about Jelly Roll except he is the Wal-Mart brand knockoff of Post Malone looks wise and has one of the stupidest stage names this side of A Boogie Wit Da Hoodie. I know he had that one song a lot of people liked last year “Son of a Sinner”. I thought it was fine. I get the appeal of drinking to deal with your faults as a person.
But this? No. This is the adult contemporary crap I have an allergic reaction to when people use their relationship with God as the basis of a song.
Except this one goes the extra mile by barely being about anything. He needs a favor. For what? Being a fuck up? Losing your wife? What are you overcoming? We know next to nothing about why he is praying to God. Nor do we know what he knows about religion except throwing Hail Marys and praising the Savior. Even Creed, for as hilarious of an act as they were, knew that they had to make their religious imagery over the top as possible to elicit a reaction.
Also this sounds like “How You Remind Me” if it was performed by a walrus getting oral surgery. So any Nickelback song really. Do me a favor and move on.
5A. “You Proof” - Morgan Wallen
Morgan.
5B. “Ain’t That Some” - Morgan Wallen
Wallen.
5C. “Last Night” - Morgan Wallen
Sucks.
5D. “Thinkin Bout Me” - Morgan Wallen
Eggs.
I toyed around with that though all year long. Is he actually a good artist? Remove all the controversy from the discussion and judge him solely as an artist. Here’s the thing I realized as this man flooded the chart with his 36 song behemoth of an album. The controversy is the only thing remotely interesting about him as an artist. Otherwise, he’s just a boring person.
I mean really think about it. Did he make any music videos for this album after it got released? Has he really done any interviews? I’ve seen that he’s canceled multiple tour dates throughout the years and seemed perfectly okay with that. It’s fascinating that the music industry’s biggest male star at the moment comes off as such a shut-in introvert. Which as an introvert myself, I get it. But is it too much to ask for some sort of excitement from one of the biggest names of the moment?
Okay to be fair, not every song that hit the year end chart this year was necessarily the worst. To be fair, two or three of the songs I would consider good.
You Proof was one of the last cuts I made from my worst list last year. What saved it was I thought the term “you proof” was too hilariously stupid to get mad at. Plus I get the sentiment behind it. But as it spent over a year on the charts, all of its glaring flaws became more apparent. Especially the obnoxious production choices that just became all the more frustrating and jarring.
Ain’t That Some is pop country at its absolute worst and stupidest. It just feels unfinished. The concept, the song itself. It just feels like it’s sole purpose is to trend on TikTok and that’s it. But even then, what part of the song!? The rushed chorus? Speaking of which, I’m really getting tired of being told how to spell in my music. There is an effective way to do it and this is not it. I can spell “country”, thanks.
Last Night. The longest reigning solo number one of all time. I can’t believe this stayed on top for sixteen weeks. That’s how you know this was a year devoid of a lot of quality. Have we ever had a number one that hit double digit weeks of reigning the chart that is devoid of anything remotely interesting to talk about? The company that it has joined: One Sweet Day, Despacito, Old Town Road. Those all felt like events when they reigned on top. This song is just a collective shrug.
Then there is Thinkin’ Bout Me. The song I would personally rank dead last of not just all the Morgan Wallen hits, but that entire 36 song clusterfuck of an album. I’ve got a strong feeling that I’ll be talking about this again next year so I’m not going to exert myself too much.
--This is Morgan Wallen trying to be Drake. Concern trolling the fuck out of his poor ex-girlfriend who has clearly moved on, but he acts like he’s clearly better than her new guy; who he says he feels sorry for. That condescending attitude is toxic and gross and makes want to kick Morgan Wallen in the fucking balls. What an asshole. Even Drake, at his worst, gives some sort of insight or insecurities of his own self; so he can knock himself down a few pegs.
Look, any other year, I would just give these all separate spots and call it a day. “You Proof” and “Ain’t That Some” would either be at 10 or very close to making the actual list. “Last Night” would probably be around this spot. And “Thinkin Bout Me” honestly would be higher like around 3 or 2. But this year was so bad, that I just had to lump them all in one category. It’s a cop out I know, but there is so much more shit to get to.
4. “Religiously” - Bailey Zimmerman
I’ll give Morgan Wallen this. He’s still better than his ripoffs. For those of you who haven’t heard of him, this is Bailey Zimmerman. He had two hits last year and one of them even charted again this year “Rock and a Hard Place”. Both of those songs sure existed. I simply have no real thoughts on either except yep, these sound like Morgan Wallen songs he rejected for being way too pop sounding.
Just like Morgan Wallen before him, he seems to have discovered the powers of utilizing TikTok to his advantage, build a dedicated streaming following, and also controversy:
https://www.tvguidetime.com/people/bailey-zimmerman-allegations-explained-ex-girlfriend-and-dating-timeline-632043.html
I don’t know how true these SA allegations are or aren’t since no major named reporting sites are talking about them. So for now, we can only judge these as allegations and not the actual truth about who Bailey Zimmerman is as a person. And I’m pretty good at separating art from artist. Have been for years. But if these are true, man these lyrics become that much harder to sit through:
And now I'm in the back of the church
Praying hard just to stop the hurt
'Cause I don't have the only woman who was there for me
Religiously
You brought me to God and I put you through Hell
You were all about us, I was all about myself
What kind of man would lose a woman like that?
If my soul could be forgiven, I would give it all back
Yeah…fuck right off Bailey Zimmerman. Even if those allegations aren’t true, what kind of person actually thinks like this?!?
Look, removing the potential controversy, this year burned me out quickly on this sort of country pop crossover garbage. And while I at least understand who would actually like Morgan Wallen’s music; I don’t get who would willingly go up to bat for Bailey Zimmerman. Especially when he sounds like the Great Value brand version of Morgan Wallen. But Zimmerman is doubling down on “Religiously” being the song that launched him to superstardom. It is the first tack from the album, Religiously. The Album. And not to confuse it with Religiously. The Tour. Are there any other Religiously’s I need to know about?
https://www.billboard.com/music/rb-hip-hop/hip-hop-no-number-one-albums-singles-charts-reasons-why-1235350404/
One of the more lower key stories of this year was just how much of a down year rap music had on the Hot 100 charts. That is mind boggling to me. Rap has never had a down year in my lifetime. Part of me thinks that it is due to 2022 having practically all the big names dropping albums and then taking an extended break, but really think about it some more. There were new names that would be on the come up between album bombs in the years past. I don’t think we have any real new names in the past few years that have had sustained success once the older names faded out of popularity. That is partially alarming. I mean look no further than what did get popular as proof.
3. “Peaches & Eggplants” - Young Nudy (featuring 21 Savage)
Ladies and gentlemen. This was one of the biggest rap hits of 2023. If this isn’t a sign as to how down of a year the genre had this year, I don’t know what is. Unless the general consensus is that this is actually a good song? I don’t even know anymore. I’m getting too old for this shit. And I really hate saying that, but listening to this song in particular makes me feel really fucking old.
This is Young Nudy. He’s the cousin of 21 Savage and…that explains a lot actually. 21 Savage is one of the big names in rap right now, so nepotism at its finest. Let me put this out there right now. Young Nudy will be lucky if he even sees this sort of success ever again without the help of his super successful cousin. Because my god, this guy just doesn’t have it. Even the very few songs I’ve heard him on prior to this, he just doesn’t have any sort of appeal or presence.
But you know what this song does have. The most obnoxious hook of the year:
https://youtube.com/shorts/-WlmvEsGRZc?si=_9hCsj723o4QGp3O
…actually that’s an insult to hooks. That’s not a hook at all. That’s just obnoxious for the sake of being obnoxious. It's remarkable as to how NOT GOOD it is. I almost want to call it so bad that it’s good…until I realize that this is a sex song. This song however is sexless in a sense of this is actually really fucking gross.
“WAP” really did set the standards high in terms of absolutely gratuitous sex songs. But here’s the thing, that song was actually really fucking good. And literally every MAN that has tried to replicate the success of “WAP” just completely misses the point. That song was written and performed by women; who have not had any empowerment to do songs that gratuitous, practically ever. When men do it, it just sounds gross. Especially 21 Savage who has never been good at these. He did a lot of guest verses this year and I still am a fan, but he’s flirting the fine line of being overexposed.
And that’s one of the big rap songs of 2023 for ya. The genre going on a commercial downswing not with a bang, but with a “”bwah bwah”.
I know I feel like I say this every year practically. But I am more serious than ever before. Fuck off Drake.
2. “Search and Rescue” - Drake
I’ve been done with Drake flooding the charts with his half-assed songs for awhile now. Hell if we are being completely honest, there are technically worse songs in his catalog. But this is where I put my foot in the ground. When you can literally pass this off as the AI version of yourself, that’s my drawing point on your artistic integrity.
2023 was the year that effectively killed AI for me. I get that we as a society are becoming so technology heavy and we continue to make waves with how advanced we can be. But the more AI starts to replace human jobs and taking away salaries from people leaving them broke, that’s where I draw the line. I HATE HATE HATE this. If I have to sit through a bad movie, it better be poorly written by an actual writer or have a bad performance from an actual actor.
You can’t tell me that Drake didn’t ChatGPT this song at least somewhat because this is the most disinterested in his own music Drake has sounded in awhile. Drake said he was going to take an extended break from music after this year; and while yeah we shall see about that I give him six months at most, this might be the first time in awhile I actually believe him. This sounds like a man who is bored of the shit he is spewing.
And oh my god, if these aren’t some of the worst lyrics Drake has ever done. I can make a top five list of the worst moments …as a matter of fact:
5. That Kim Kardashian snippet - Look Kanye has effectively been canceled. Can you let this beef that nobody cares about anymore die?
4. “I’m tryin to hit the group chat and tell ‘em it’s a wrap” - Even I know that is not what you will tell your group chat. Yes, let us literally imagine Drake telling his friends I found the one who I want to marry…I can’t even finish that sentence without laughing.
3. “Don’t hit me up and WYD me. Send a boy a P-I-C or see me baby.” - What a true gentleman you are. Fucking gross, especially in a song where you want this woman to come “rescue you”, but you still want to see her nudes first.
2. “American Express my love for you” - What was Capital you are the One not a good enough line for you? I swear dad joke Drake is making me miss dad joke Eminem. He is that much worse at it than Em ever was….but that isn’t even the worst dad joke in this song. That honor goes to:
1. “You know I’m a Pitbull, but dale mami” - .. even Mr. 305 himself has never had a line that bad. I’m glad that there has been some revisionist history over Pitbull and his silly party music. He may have made some dumb songs years ago, but they were harmless enough for me. Drake using that Pitbull line just rubbed me incredibly wrong in ways that I didn’t think was possible. Fuck you Drake.
That last album, man what a ride that was. It was perfectly okay. It actually might have been Drake’s best album in eight years. One huge positive? “Search & Rescue” was not on it.
And before we get to the extremely predictable number one, some dishonorable mentions:
“Super Freaky Girl” - Nicki Minaj
This year was so bad that this avoided making my worst list for the second year in a row.
“I Like You (A Happier Song)” - Post Malone & Doja Cat
This year was so bad that this avoided making my worst list for the second year in a row.
“Made You Look” - Meghan Trainor
I said this was not going to make the worst list. That does not exclude the dishonorable mentions. Call that an improvement for Meghan Trainor.
“Dancin in the Country” - Tyler Hubbard
I’ve been mixed on Georgia…err I mean Tyler Hubbard’s solo outings at best. But this one just flat out sucks. It’s like Florida Georgia Line never broke up.
“Eyes Closed” - Ed Sheeran
I actually feel bad putting this on here. I honestly feel really bad that “-“ flopped the way it did, period. That was definitely Ed’s most personal and best album I’ve heard from him. But this song was easily the worst from that album and a terrible choice as a lead off single. Those faint “aye-yay-ayes” in the chorus just isn’t an effective hook. Do better.
“Die For You” - The Weeknd & Ariana Grande
The cruel irony of everything that worked about these two improving the original “Save Your Tears” did not work a second time. Ariana’s inclusion on this feels ridiculously forced and her and The Weeknd do not have chemistry for the first time ever. Amazing because this actually makes me like the original a lot less and made me forget what I ever liked about it to begin with. So in other words, this is a forced remix made solely to snag a number one hit.
“Vampire” - Olivia Rodrigo
Easily my hottest take of the year but this song is just a disaster. Literally the only thing this has going for it is that Olivia is a good actress and can sell this sort of heartbreak and anger. Everything else about it is just petty and juvenile and we’ve been through all of this that last album cycle. In context with the rest of GUTS, this makes a little more sense, but even then, I still don’t like it. This is her worst song so far. Plus “fame fucker” is one of the worst lyrics of the year.
“Thank God” - Kane Brown & Katelyn Brown
This is actively making me rather listen to Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani do more duets together. Let’s just say there’s a reason why only one of these singers has seen actual success. And even then, Kane Brown has done one too many of these half baked love songs that I’m getting incredibly bored of him. Also can we please stop making this gimmick of husband/wife duets happen in country music?
“Memory Lane” - Old Dominion
This is what everyone who hated “Closer” by The Chainsmokers thought that song sounded like. Except written by a bunch of guys nearing 50. They only wished they had a lyric as memorable as “that mattress that you stole from your roommate back in Boulder”.
“What It Is” - Doechii (featuring Kodak Black)
What a huge disappointment this turned out to be. This is the same Doechii who made female empowerment bop after female empowerment bop the past couple years. If you told me her mainstream breakthrough hit would be this generic as fuck 2000s thugs need love throwback, I would have told you 2023 would be one of the worst years ever. Also the thug that needs love is Kodak Black? Fuck right off. This was the last cut from the actual worst list solely for sheer disappointment. Seriously listen to Doechii’s other stuff, she’s so much better than indulging a convicted rapist needs love too.
“Daylight” - David Kushner
If 2023 was a sound. Rarely have I ever seen somebody so badly trying to emulate someone else and completely missing the mark. In this case, it wants to be “Take Me to Church” by Hozier. I didn’t like that song at the time, but I respect it so much more now after hearing this shit. Next to last cut from the actual list.
“Under the Influence” - Chris Brown
Nothing says this was a very bad year than “Chris Brown deep cut sleeper hit”. Sad thing is that I actually do get the appeal of this song and think that in the hands of a much better artist, this song could possibly work. The production on this is very good. This only makes the worst list because of the awful artist who made it specfically.
“Meltdown” - Travis Scott (featuring Drake)
Sicko Mode this is not. Beefing with Pharrell? Are you both stupid!? Also, Travis Scott sure fell off. Am I right? Honestly listening to this man’s music after the 2021 AstroWorld deaths and not taking any responsibility just really makes you reassess the performer and the person. Also using his new album as a Trojan horse to sneak in a Kanye comeback also leaves a bad taste in my mouth. As much as I loved Kanye’s music, what he did shows no sympathy from me and fuck Travis Scott for thinking we still need Kanye in 2023. We don’t need him and we certainly don’t need you either.
“Rich Men North of Richmond” - Oliver Anthony Music
Amateur. Very much amateur. Like this shouldn’t have been worth all the rage and frustration many people before me gave this stupid song. Honestly, I feel like I’m going to be more sympathetic towards this song than others this year. Because I do find this song at least fascinatingly bad in comparison to all the other politically driven songs that made their presence felt on the charts this year.
The fact that the far left AND far right were throwing their hands up in the air at outrage over this doofus who clearly didn’t want this song to become a hit, let alone top the charts itself, just further exemplifies how political we have become as a society. Which I don’t know if I’ve told you all before, but I have always hated discussing politics. And while I’ve found myself at least identifying more with political affiliations and stances than I did fifteen years ago, I don’t think centrist is necessarily a bad thing. If anything, I personally have liberal views socially while having conservative views about inflation (although fuck feeding the rich). So the fact that I completely get where Oliver Anthony’s views are coming from, he couldn’t have communicated them in a more amateurish and dumber way.
But hey, it could always be worse. Which let’s just cut the bullshit. Number one is that other politically driven country song.
1. “Try That in a Small Town” - Jason Aldean
This is going to top a lot of worst of the year lists, to the surprise of absolutely nobody. I haven’t seen a song that is universally hated by the masses like this in quite some time. And yes, that does not include “the silent majority” who helped get this to the top of the charts.
This strikes me as different from stan armies using chart loopholes to push songs only they care about to the top for bragging rights... the success of Jason Aldean is an accurate depiction of the taste of a massive subset of the US populace (the worst subset to be specific). How big this subset is incredibly disappointing to me, but I digress.
I mean let’s cut the bullshit. Jason Aldean is a fucking asshole. And that was long before he went full MAGA the last few years. He has always been an asshole. He cheated on his wife. He and his dumbass wife bullied Maren Morris into quitting country music. He has countless chauvinistic views that have largely gone unnoticed in his own music. He’s besties with the ex POS. He’s just an asshole that has only had sustained success because he is the only profitable artist on his label. And you would think all of his public bullshit over the last few years would have led to his exodus from Nashville after this song that has actually been afloat for nearly a year underperformed?
Nope. He played the reactionary market like a fucking fiddle; which is not on this song because Aldean has literally no respect for actual country music with his lack of any organic country sounds in his music. The discourse all comes from that music video that only further highlighted the pro-lynching and racial undertones up to the forefront. The music video if you chose to actually watch this garbage was filmed at the lynch site of Henry Choate in 1927 and the Columbia race riot of 1946. Aldean’s video producers have been on the record saying that they just picked the location because its a popular film and music video location. To that, I say bullshit.
The song, without the pro lynching and racial insensitivity, is your by the numbers country song about rugged self-sufficiency and how being from big cities is evil and small towns are the best. Jason Aldean, of course, did not write this song. He has never written his own music, why start now? If the songwriters actually gave a shit to do their research, Jason Aldean is from Macon, Georgia. One of the most populated cities in that state. So your whole argument is automatically invalid about being from a small town.
Speaking of which, all those blustering threats of the violence one would face in a small town is absolutely insufferable. Let’s remove the context that those lines are specifically about the Black Lives Matter protesting. And rewind all the way back to 2017 when there was a mass shooting in Las Vegas at a Jason Aldean concert. Where he was on the record condemning our gun laws and how guns were too easy to get. What a 180 to where now guns would resolve differences and unrest and protesting.
I could literally nitpick every single element of this song to death and show how vile and toxic this song represents and stands for. But you’ve probably read as many articles this year and all the opinion pieces that I don’t want to make the same repetitive talking points. Instead, I want to talk about how this worked its way to the top of the charts. Primarily, how this song highlights the divide in the country more than ever before. Liberal thinkpieces and the public reactionary market skyrocketed clickbait about it. The conservative market wanted to blast this song as their new anthem to “fuck the left”. Hell two of the presidential candidates that will inevitably lose to Agent Orange used this as their campaign piece; further proving how out of touch the extreme right can be with reality.
Which let’s not act like there are right wing and left wing provoking music before this decade. Hell I remember plenty of Bush era country songs that sparked controversy in their own right and anti-Bush songs that turned into some of the most memorable hits of the decade. But there is an emphatic difference between letting your statement heard than trying to incite actual violence. Which lets not mince all the backlash statements and backpedaling. Jason Aldean knows exactly what the fuck he’s doing. Compare that to Oliver Anthony above; who I bet you anything he was not prepared to go viral. He wanted to sing his stupid little ditty for his YouTube channel and was not prepared for an actual number one hit. Aldean is a seasoned veteran at this point in his near twenty year career and is only doing this to get attention and stay relevant because he doesn’t want to lose his spot to a younger contemporary. And politics and shock value are literally all he has left at this point since he can’t get a reaction any other way.
This may be the most predictable number one in the history of year end list seasons and I absolutely would not be surprised if there are people out there that want to buck the trend and surprise people with any other song than this one. And I totally get it. I too would like to use the bad is the absence of good argument or this song makes me feel absolutely nothing for any other song. But allow me to suggest this counterpoint. Is there any other song that is absent of anything remotely good as this? Would you rather feel nothing or feel absolutely insulted by clickbait outrage right wing garbage like this? I hate talking politics as much as the next guy, but when a song explicitly tries to incite violence against racial injustice protesting; that pushes personal values and boundaries for me.
Fuck this song, fuck Jason Aldean, fuck anyone defending this dogshit, and hopefully next year’s worst hit song won’t be as exceptionally atrocious as this.
